Though a couple can of course be a “family”, here we are referring mostly to the nuclear family, parents and children. We include also 3-generational families.
The family is a network and just as a radio or tv network needs and thrives on proper communication, so it is with the family. Without it, the family is begging for trouble—sooner or later.
Is it necessary, is it kind, is it important are three key questions to ask before initiating communication.
Is what is being discussed closely related to current time as possible, is another consideration. Bringing up old issues normally does not carry with it the energy of a ‘real time’ issue. We can relax, however, in the knowledge that always undealt with issues arise in the here and now. ‘If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,’ is fine, but if it is broken, rest assured it will present itself.
Though children often manifest their parents’ issues, they also bring their own to the family table. Though this may ‘complicate’ matters, from a certain point of view, it also, of course, magnifies the opportunities for love and joy. That is where we want to go in and out of therapy.